WONDER, JOY, LAUGHTER
“Today, try pausing before any action you take and recall how that action made you feel in the past. For example, writing often seems frightening or burdensome to me before I start, yet as many writers before me have said, I love having written. On the other hand, while nothing seems more appetizing to me than baked goods, I know that both wheat and sugar leave me feeling droopy and queasy. Just pausing to vividly recall the past result of each action helps me choose writing over procrastination and bananas over cookies. If you think through how each action leaves you feeling, you’ll find yourself more and more able to choose those that add up to your best life.” (Martha Beck)
On Saturday morning I was inspired to drive up to the farmers market in Waimea in search of a few made-in-Hawaii Christmas gifts, and stock up on some fresh produce before having our grand-daughter come to stay on Sunday. Not having eaten any breakfast in my haste to head for Waimea, I ate one of the half dozen chocolate croissants I bought from what is rumored to be the best bakery in Hawaii. It was delicious! But once the sugar rush wore off I could hardly stay awake for the forty five minute drive back to our place.
This provided a graphic example of what Beck is saying in the above quote. I’d always wondered what was meant by “follow your bliss”, “go with the flow” and other such glib expressions that inevitably left me doubting the structures or lifestyle disciplines I have developed in order to lead what I deem a healthy, satisfying and productive life. Flossing isn’t fun, but I like the way my mouth feels after a good dental cleaning. Folding the laundry or tidying the house aren’t initially appealing, but I breathe more easily without having clutter all around me. And while following my bliss might suggest I binge watch episodes of a favorite tv show, writing my blog can be a struggle indeed. I know I said I was taking a break, but when it comes to answering how I feel after having written a blog, I find nothing more fulfilling or satisfying.
By thinking through how each action leaves me feeling I’m at least able to register what results I wish to perpetuate and what choices or decisions I won’t make again. Somewhere between always choosing what is considered good for me, and giving in to the temptation of immediate gratification lies what I think of as a balanced, examined life. Checking in with my feelings is the most reliable gauge of whether I am following my bliss, or have somehow lost my way. Daily reflection helps me catch myself before falling off the spiritual wagon, as it were, and some form of spiritual practice restores my equanimity and helps get me back on track again.
Three words came to me as I reflected on what feelings would indicate that my life is on track: wonder, joy and laughter. When I take time to truly register my surroundings, wonder bubbles up like a fresh spring inside of me. When I transcend my ego and do something selfless for somebody else, joy suffuses my body. And when talking story or sharing a joke, laughter feels like a balm to my soul.
May I suggest you find your own “feeling words” to track in your journal, and, ideally inform what you choose to do in future.
Now I can reward myself with another episode of Death in Paradise. To each his/her/their own.
Maybe not the best choice. 🤔 What’s the banana of tv shows?